Life Coach Lisa Thomas of the P3 Group tells Valonda, Co-host of NBC 17 My Carolina Today how to control the chatter going on in your head: Identify emotional triggers, give them a name, embrace them as a part of you, and choose your vision to be in the driver’s seat of your life.
I recently ran across an interview conducted with Dr. Gersten, a psychiatrist who is a diplomat of the American Board of Psychiatry and Neurology. He mentioned in his interview that we run about 15,000 thoughts a day through our head and about half of them are negative. Wow, that’s a lot of thinking, but I can see that it’s very true.
Think about it – no pun intended, but seriously think about it for a moment. We all have perceptions and judgments about things even though we’re not consciously aware of it. There’s always some internal chatter going on in our mind. We’re analyzing, judging, criticizing, questioning, agreeing, disagreeing and injecting our perceptions on daily situations. And it seems particularly loud when there’s a big vision or goal that we’re trying to reach.
I believe we all want to have power and choice in life. No one wants to be restricted, controlled or bound, but that’s really what happens when we don’t have control over our thoughts or the chatter in our mind. We’re literally being driven by the thoughts we’re having.
So offering new ways of approaching your automatic thoughts might give you more power in your every day decision making. I’ve created a few steps you can take to begin regaining your power seat in life.
Identify the internal chatter. What does it sound like? For example if you’re considering a big goal, some thoughts that might surface are:
Is this the right decision?
What if I mess this up?
What if they found out I’m not who they think I am
Am I good enough?
What if I look bad or embarrass myself?
What if I fail?
What if I succeed?
Who’s asking and answering these questions is what I call the “committee in your mind”. This committee guides and shapes your decisions, choices, actions and responses. And the committee doesn’t discriminate so these questions could pop up in any area of life whether it is finances, relationships, career or family. And they can break out in a meeting, prompting questions and statements at any time without supervision, hence the 15,000 thoughts Dr. Gersten mentioned. So, it’s critical to know the voice of your committee members.
Give them a name – Since you know they have a voice, give them a name. The fun part about your committee is in the names you give each of them. Everyone has an undeniable Judge Judy. Judge Judy is always judging, slamming the gravel and giving the sentence of your life. She knows best and lays down the law. I have Mad Max who’s angry, protective and gets things done. Others may not be so obvious like the saboteur who’s sabotaging every goal you set. There’s the dominator, protector, manipulator, therapist, and the little shy girl/boy. There may be a bold boastful one, an assured confident one or an insecure one; the list goes on. When you determine the voice of who they are, the next level of power and choice begins in naming them. If you know who they are, you have choice when it comes to making decisions.
Embrace them as a part of you: Embracing your committee sends a message to yourself that says I accept me. I love, honor, appreciate and celebrate all of who I am. As you embrace who you are, your power to choose elevates. No one wants to be rejected so you are not excluded. Owning the good, the bad and the indifferent sets the stage for greatness to occur.
Choose your vision to be in the driver’s seat of your life: Know your vision. Vision and Mission is your power source. The power begins when you allow your vision to be the driver of your life rather than your committee members.
As you can see a new awareness of your thoughts is now at your fingertips. Carefully select them wisely and bring to life a new way of making decisions and choices. And the next time you’re faced with a big goal and your committee comes to hold a board meeting, allow your vision to chair your meeting.
Just remember the Power lives within you and it’s always been there.
Lisa Thomas is a Vision and Leadership Support Coach, Visionary for Women and Inspirational Speaker.
Please contact her at 910 221 9294 or 704 909 7663 complete the online contact form below.
Feel free to contact her directly for your P3 Power Session where you will begin the journey of discovery. It will be the best 60 minutes of your life. Remember, power, purpose and vision begins within the spirit of who you are.