The title of this installment reminds me of a chant from an organization, National Black Society (NBS), at my alma mater. It works better if I had a chair next to you at your computer, but the chant starts “Are you motivated? Yes, I’m motivated!” So Wilder is motivated and it’s about time. First I want to say thank you to my faithful readers because I heard through the grapevine praise that was much needed.
I am motivated to go back to school. **Gasp** Yes, as much as I was completely against the notion, I realized that finding a job could possibly take a year. As many economists and financial experts think they know the end of the recession or when there will be a job boom, the truth is no one knows. I don’t plan on twiddling my thumbs hoping I’ll get a call for a second interview, which feels like a life and death matter by the way. Lucky for me I’m not a mother or wife so its o.k. for me to be employed part-time. I am in a lovely place called the beginning.
Surprisingly this weather has motivated me to press on persevere through the downtown winds backhanding me in. Just like the world itself the winter is only going to get colder and harder to make it to work, an interview, or the library. I believe there is some element in your life that is pushing you that you may not be aware of, so take a minute and acknowledge it. After you have done that keep going because there’s always something around the corner waiting for you.
“ . . . Life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness!” These aren’t mere words. They are our inalienable rights proclaimed in our beloved Declaration of Independence! I am concerned “we the people” have gotten somewhat off-track with respect to these rights. Is it possible we are evolving from an independent nation of progressive, responsible citizens who once respected life, appreciated liberty and took responsibility to pursue one’s own happiness into a dependent nation of individuals who simply take it all for granted, a society that believes it is ENTITLED to certain privileges? Is anyone entitled to hand outs regardless of misappropriations propagated from selfish actions and poor decisions? Is everyone entitled to have without giving? Do we recognize that the more we accept hand outs, the more we abdicate our liberties? I fear we may be heading down that path, so with great deliberation, determination, and affection, I’ve penned my own declaration. Allow me to share my Declaration of Entitlement!
I hereby proclaim I am entitled to be the best I can be everyday. Let me clarify – I am entitled to choose to work to be the best I can be. Oh, I can settle for mediocrity or rest on past laurels. Or I can sit back and wait for something good to happen to me or for me. But I am NOT entitled to special dispensation because of my attitudes, circumstances, or bad choices. I am NOT entitled to better myself at the expense of another. I am entitled to be the best I can be everyday, as I give my best everyday. In giving my best, I AM my best!
Further, I am entitled to accept responsibility for who, what and where I am in my life. President Truman’s motto “The Buck Stops Here” roars in stark contrast to today’s mantra “It’s not MY fault.” In Andy Andrews’ book “The Traveler’s Gift,” Mr. Truman’s advice to the “Traveler” was - Don’t ask “why me?” Ask “why not me?” After all, my thinking and my choices are what have gotten me where I am. How can I cast blame elsewhere? Like the “Traveler”, I will seek wisdom and be a person of action so I can determine where I made mistakes, learn from them and rectify them. I will NOT relinquish my liberty by expecting someone else to do it for me.
Last, I am entitled to make mistakes. Nelson Mandela said, “The greatest glory in living life is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.” I will stumble; I will fall. I will fail to meet the expectations of others. I will not offer excuses; I will not blame others. I am entitled to make mistakes, to be humble, to forgive and to be forgiven.
Remember when I asked if we realized that in accepting handouts, we abdicate our liberties? I’d like to share a story I believe represents a wonderful illustration of that point. I don’t know the author but the title is “Beware of Friendly Captivity!” It’s the story of two best friends, an eagle and a chicken. They are loving life as they fly around enjoying the freedom of flight, appreciating the glory of the landscape and gathering their food as they need it. One day they fly over a beautiful farm and decide to go down and investigate. They make quick friends with the farm animals and while they are visiting, the farmer brings out food for everyone and they all eat until they are stuffed! They are having so much fun, they decide to spend the night. The next day presents the same scenario, fun and frolic with their new friends, and again the farmer brings enough food to them that they eat until they are filled.
On the 3rd day, the eagle decides it’s time to move on and asks the chicken if he’s ready to leave. The chicken says, “You know, I kind of like it here. Not only do I have the freedom to come and go as I please and enjoy the interaction with my friends, I don’t have to look for and gather my food. My food is brought out and I can eat all I want. So, I think I’ll stick around here for awhile.” The eagle tells the chicken goodbye and assures him he’ll come back to check on him in two weeks. As promised, the eagle returns two weeks later but he cannot find his friend the chicken. It seems the farmer and his wife had guests over the night before . . . and guess what they decided to serve for dinner? You’ve got it – fried chicken! Beware of friendly captivity!
We live in a remarkable country in an amazing time! Let’s not mistake our inalienable rights to mean that the best in life will be given to us or that our way will be made easy! Let’s be like the eagle; let’s respect life, value our freedom and pursue happiness responsibly!
If you have comments or questions for the author, you can email GiGi at tidbitz2009@yahoo.com .
Finally, it was a quiet day in the office of CEO and President of The North Carolina Minority Support Center, Paula McCoy. I was particularly struck by Paula’s humbling presence and her passion for helping communities succeed.
What a fascinating story! How often have you heard people talk about finding a mentor to coach you along the road to success or get the education to teach you how to be successful? Paula is the epitome of a leader who finds what she needs within the scope of her environment.
Imagine being born in a family of 13. Imagine having a child at an early age and returning to a home where no one knows your true passions. Imagine standing at the crossroads of one the biggest decisions of your life. What choices do you make when you’re standing at the crossroads? And how do you choose with power, passion, grace and dignity. Paula candidly shares how.
Early on, Paula learned the power being competitive. From being born into a large family to single motherhood to standing at the crossroads and making one of the most difficult decisions ever, Paula found ways to navigate success out of each and every moment. You will be inspired by her story of optimism, hope, and leadership.
Paula’s vision from an early age was about helping others realize their potential; but little did she know she was on a journey to helping "communities" realize their potential for success.
Sit back and enjoy this interview as Paula shares what she knows for sure and how self discovery is the key to being a great leader and finding a greater vision.
Grab a pen and paper to jot down some notes as you learn from one of our great P3 Pearls of the World.
Paula McCoy is a native of Winston-Salem. She attended the public schools and graduated from Carver High School. She received her undergraduate and postgraduate degrees from North Carolina A & T State University earning a Bachelor of Arts Degree in English Education and a Master of Arts Degree in Education Administration and Supervision. McCoy successfully completed coursework in Duke University’s Certificate Program in Nonprofit Management and earned a Masters in Social Work (MSW) with a concentration in community development at Case Western Reserve University in Cleveland, Ohio on May 15, 2005.
August 1, 2007, McCoy assumed the role as the President/CEO for the
North Carolina Minority Support Center (NCMSC) and Generations Community Credit Union (GCCU). The NCMSC is a statewide advocate that partners with Community Development Credit Unions (CDCUs), providing technical assistance, grants and loans to help them build generational wealth and create opportunities for individuals, families and communities. NCMSC envisions financial self-sufficiency and sustainability for themselves, their CDCU partners and the members they serve. The Support Center sponsored GCCU in 2002 and maintains a close relationship, assisting them toward self-sufficiency.
Prior to this McCoy was the Program Director for the Local Initiatives Support Corporation in W-S and worked closely with a local advisory committee of funders and Community Development Corporation’s (CDCs) to implement strategies designed to strengthen CDCs and the communities they serve. She was also responsible for raising over $2 million in philanthropy to fund LISC operations and grants to CDCs over the past three years. McCoy was employed in various roles at LISC for seven years.
McCoy was also the Executive Director of Northwest Child Development Council from 1994 to 2000, almost five years. Northwest, a 30+ year organization, manages 13 child care centers in five counties in North Carolina. Her other professional roles included Adult Basic Skills and GED Coordinator at Forsyth Technical Community College, Community Liaison at East Winston Community Development Corporation, trainer an owner of a management consulting firm, teacher and computer operator. McCoy serves her community and has been active on numerous boards. She has been active in local politics and has served in leadership capacities in her local party.
McCoy is an energetic, motivated and committed individual dedicated to helping others realize their potential for success. Her experience in administration and supervision expand over fifteen years. Since 1985, McCoy has worked with numerous individuals, businesses and community-based organizations in the areas of personal, professional, organizational and community development. She considers this as her “life work”.
Writing soothes my soul and allows me to escape into my own created world where there are no boundaries. It calms me and takes me into an unknown world well worth the adventure. Much of my writing is the window to the heart, soul and mind of Lisa. While writing had been a hobby for many years, I opened that window for all the world to see when I did my first self-published booklet in 1997.
Poetry, on the other hand, was a hidden passion, peeking in on a deeper more intimate side of me. When I’m writing poetry there are no rules to follow, something I struggled with as a child. As a young girl, I was placed in a special remedial class for students who needed additional help with their reading skills. Little did I know how monumentally limiting that moment would be for me. With that experience, I decided my writing wasn’t good enough for anyone to see.
Eventually, I found that there were rules about writing, ways you should write even rules about life that I must follow to be good. I created my own hidden world of rules for writing, my own rules of life, and kept them in a safe place hidden from everyone. Publicly, I focused my energies on mathematics and earned a B.S.in Business Administration with a concentration in Finance. Although silent, the writer in me remained.
Funny, that I was teaching women to live passionately and to have powerful, fulfilled lives, yet my poetry was a hidden passion. I realized keeping it a secret was compromising my integrity. It was time to unleash, unlock and empower the extraordinary woman within.
My husband encouraged me to read my poetry aloud as often as possible given my love and passion for it. At an open mic night while visiting California, the positive response finally convinced me to believe my friends, my husband, and most importantly, to believe in myself. I decided to let go of the past about not being a good writer and to let it rip. I assembled an electronic book, A Collection on Love, Loss and Life and five accompanying poetic prints.
I believe there is a writer in all of us. The process of opening up your creativity is not a simple formula; each woman has her own process but the following steps worked for me:
1) Find the space for your creativity to emerge. You must be still to hear from your inner self, your spirit. Webster defines "be" as "to exist or live." Being requires very little effort, very little thought, because you ARE simply by virtue of being alive.
Further, Webster defines "still" as "noiseless; silent, stationary and tranquil; calm." In being still, you want to calm and center yourself, focusing on being present to the moment. One way to do this is to find a place of solitude, a tranquil place when you can actively listen for what’s needed and wanted.
2) Open your heart to your passions. In the still moments you want to listen to your spirit and begin to give language to your inner voice.
Ask yourself:
* What is it that I most love?
* What is life like when I lose track of time?
* What am I engaged in?
* What is the experience?
* What are my most intimate thoughts?
* When am I most alive?
3) Think of how you feel . Notice what emotions are bubbling up within you. Our emotions are the flags of our passions waving us down the path to our truest selves.
4) As your thoughts unfold, capture your experience on paper. Give it life by writing it as vividly and specifically as you can. Thank the Editor for sharing and send her away! Just be still and write until you are empty, describing every feeling, every thought and every emotion. I’ll leave you with an excerpt from my poem.
If My Passion Could Feel If my passion could feel, it would spread its wings open, fly and soar Wide open.
Oh, freely gliding.
Free. Free. Free to be, to create, concentrate, relate from a clean slate.
And make visions of one’s own calling.
Embrace and face the world with a full succulent force and rejoice.
It would swoop up those who long and choose to be with me….finding peace and serenity within.
Ahhhh, yes, if my passion could feel….
Free, oooohhhh free, Wild-like free, free, freeeeeeeee…
Funny, that I was teaching women to live passionately and to have powerful, fulfilled lives, yet my poetry was a hidden passion. I realized keeping it a secret was compromising my integrity. It was time to unleash, unlock and empower the extraordinary woman within.
